Aaron Silvers

It’s part of my New Year’s Resolutions…

1. Simplify
2. Focus
3. Have Fun
4. Act

Simplify

In the last year, we got out of a massive burden of debt with a lot of help from our parents. This year, I’m **trying to** adopt Suzy’s more frugal habits. So I’m taking a hard look at what I spend money on. I cut back quite a bit last year from previous years. This year, I need to do more, so there will be no Lollapalooza this year, no travel to Pittsburgh or elsewhere (much as I’d love to see Brian graduate out in Denver). We have enough other things we need to spend money on this year and I just spent some of it yesterday.

Suzy has a really good habit of ditching clothes out of our closet that we don’t use, as well as books we don’t read. I’m dropping projects I don’t do anything with and have kept lingering too long. So I’m writing more now because if I’m keeping this site, then I need to make a habit of using it. Otherwise, what’s the point?

We’re down to one car, which we’re getting in the habit of planning around, and it’s working (so far). If we can consolidate in other ways, we’ll probably try it. That’s not some veiled hint — that’s just our current M.O.

Focus

This is a new kind of feeling for me, because I’m going into year #2 at a job and I’m struggling to suppress the habit of readying to leave the job. Truth is, even though it has its trying moments, it’s still a really good job and people actually tell me I’m good at it — and I don’t have to beg them for the feedback, both good and constructive (which is still pretty good). The commute is kinda painful, but doing things to make the time more constructive and somewhat fun, I guess it could be a lot worse.

Point is, that when you’re not focused on leaving, there’s a huge void now and I need to focus on what’s next for my career. I talked to my boss’s boss yesterday, and it doesn’t seem like I need to go back to school to move up in the organization — not that there’s a plan for me to move up, but at least it’s acknowledged that I need to grow. So channeling the energies I normally reserve for backup planning… and actually putting faith in an organization to become further invested in it… well, that’s a new one on me. We’ll see how this works, though I expect to struggle with that kind of trust.

I’ll say this, though. It’s pretty liberating to realize that no one is forcing you out of a job, even more so when they recognize that they’re even going to try and make it more comfortable to stay. So instead of my every two years of focusing on changing… I can focus on growing.

And shrinking. I need to lose weight. I’ve even voiced to Suzy I’m willing to eat shit I hate to make it happen. If I can get my work schedule back under control, I’ll start working out on a regular basis and maybe I really can drop forty pounds before #2 shows up in July.

Have Fun

It’s not like I never have fun, but generally in the last nine years, it’s been a lot of work really hard and then party really hard… and that takes a toll. I need to both make and take time to enjoy things on a more constant basis, and that should make it easier for Suzy and Logan and everyone else if we’re all a bit less manic. Plus, it provides a constant cushion for when things get tense, and they will with a second kid and a tighter pull on our budget. It’s just the way it is.

But we have some advantages this year that we didn’t have last year or the year before. One is that we’re not looking to move this year. Another is that we have a growing core group of in-town friends in the same boat as us, so while we may be poor and beleaguered by baby poop, we’re not alone anymore, and our friends seem to be very much like us — where we don’t think much about taking a pack-and-play along with us and staying late to enjoy the company of friends while the kid(s) crash at their place (or the other way around when people come over to our place). In fact, we’ve been busier with friends of late on the weekends than pretty much the first 10 months of last year. That helps a lot.

Act

Suzy’s taking 9 credits this semester, and if the first day is any indication, it’s going to be much better than her last semester. Logan’s getting smarter. We’re in a good place. We can make a few tweaks here and there and continue to get more comfy and ride out a year with so much “change.”

That also means writing to a blog that I bother keeping. It also means getting my fat gut to a gym and not eat a burger for lunch, even when I want it.